1 Britain can scream at a level that can't even be heard by dogs...in a packed grocery store...full of perfect children who stay in shopping carts and don't open food before it's paid for therefore being the child that all mommies tell their children never to act like.
2 She kicks and punches her teacher. I think she is most possessed while in preschool because it takes place in a basement room of a catholic church.
3 Matt is totally handsome enough to be the Devil.
4 Cleanliness is next to Godliness which explains why she removes all the water from her bath and onto my bathroom floor and doesn't let me brush her hair or her teeth EVER without a throw down. This also explains why she insists on trying to wear the same outfit everyday.
5 Her cheeks get bright red from the heat that radiates from her body on a 30 degree day. She likes to run around in a pair of dress up shoes and nothing else. Her favorite drink is water with ice.
6 I have seen her horns and she has a devil's hoof print on her back. It used to look just like a heart but it has now separated into two hooves. This is not sarcasm. This is no joke.
7 She is banned from coming with me to watch the big girl's little baby sisters (triplets). She amused herself by screaming so loudly they cried in fear and pain. Or they saw through her disguise.
8 Her favorite moments in movies or TV shows are when people get hurt, fall down or get knocked out. She will laugh out loud.
9 She is the most misbehaved when I have a very important meeting/phone call/Starbucks appt.
10 She has been entirely EVIL in the car on the way to Matt's parents, spouting I HATE YOUs and YOU'RE NOT MY MOMMY while unbuckling her car seat and rolling down her window to chuck books and toys out of my moving vehicle. But when we get in the driveway of their house, she has transformed into the sweetest little girl you've ever seen. Even her pigtails are in place. And they believe not a word I say.
"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist."
Britain had a pretty great Easter. Not only did she win the GRAND PRIZE at the Easter Egg hunt on Saturday at the Kingsley United Methodist Church but she was in the Erie Times for it. Plus she found her 
Well, round 3 of Erie Idol down, semi finals and finals (fingers crossed) to go. This time we actually took pictures and now there is documented proof that I wore animal print, neon pink nail polish and a lace belt all in one outfit.
Awhile back, my mother called the day after I made it through to this round and reserved the balcony area at Oasis. This is why Diana gets whatever she wants. You cannot tell my mother no. She will not accept nor acknowledge anything less than her ultimate outcome. That woman must have called Oasis 10 times making sure we had the right count and I had a thrown to sit on. They did draw the line at a crown.
Some of the chicks of '96 came. Here's my BFFs from high school Mary (in pink) and Shelly (in virgin white) with their husbands Mike (no hat) and Chris (hat).
My sister Theresa showed up with her husband and invited her BFF from high school Wendy and Wendy's boyfriend Dan out as well. Wendy was celebrating her CANT SAY THE NUMBER birthday in a few days and decided to celebrate early with shot....
Here's my brother in law Mike no doubt wondering what the hell he just consumed. 
Jillian showed up with her baby daddy Kevin and their two friends in tow. Andrew and Andrew's wife, I wanna say Jen?, who were actually there to see another contestant. Anyways, when they get there the first thing out of Jen's? mouth to Kevin was "Oh my God, is that Pat Benetar?" with an eye roll towards me. And Kevin retorted, "No, that's Jill's best friend." HAHAHAHA Yes! 
Theresa (after a few shots) wasn't afraid a no cuppage.
And my uncle Denny and my father were there for the whole thing. Awkward!
Matt and his favorite aunt Sandi (Chase) Staab.
My father in law Glynn and Granny Chase.
See Blogtopia, don't worry about us. We're good. Love Is A Battlefield.
My father is hilarious! He made signs for people to hold up. None of the people pictured came and my father in law that DID come was pissed he wasn't made a sign. I'm not the favorite daughter in law anymore.
This was Sandi's reaction to the other singers.
"WTF is she singing?"
My dad, although he came with the signs, was a total traitor clapping for the other contestants. DISCLAIMER: I realize sarcasm doesn't always convey on here. I have no qualms with my father or anyone else clapping for the other finalists. If you have the talent to be in this competition and you're good at what you do, you deserve the recognition and the encouragement. People have actually told me "these people are not your friends, they are your competition". I have never been, nor will I ever be, competitive to that degree. I can't stand that attitude of having to be better than everyone else. I give credit where credit is due. That's how my 'rents raised me. If they had a Miss Congeniality award in this contest, that's what I would win. That's just who I am. I'm Pat Fucking Benetar.
My mom in the green and my aunt Marge.
Lori, my sis Michelle and Mike: Honorary members of the Tam Fan Club.
Michelle, you look frightened.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: Mike Mahler never takes a bad picture.
Too cute!
My sister in law (and my 
"Buddy Bands! Hey... They work."
Therese picked this guy up at the bar. Actually that's Bob, her boyfriend. They are totally going steady. 
