Sunday, December 10, 2006

All His Co-Workers Were Doing It

Well, it wasn't the most eloquent evening Saturday. Matt and I had plans to attend his office party around 5 and then off to the annual Barber Ball afterwards. Things didn't exactly go as planned.

There's been a few pounds I've put on since Halloween, so the ballgown skirt I had planned on wearing that evening wasn't exactly fitting the way it used to. I decided to go with a very light lunch (skipping breakfast) and drink bottle after bottle of water. The party for Matt's office wasn't exactly formal so I threw on black pants and decided they looked so great, I'd just screw the skirt. I figured I'd just eat at the party. I have a problem if I don't eat and then I drink a lot. It catches up to me quickly.

And the food wasn't exactly to my liking so I barely ate.
And the 6 shots with his co-workers and 5 rum and diet cokes at the open bar DID seem to catch up.
And all of the sudden I'm in the restroom, heels sticking out from under the door, wretching...and wretching...and feeling like I was constantly falling.
And we had to skip the Barber Ball.
And I was passed out with my top still on before midnight.
And I don't remember a lot after throwing up.
So Matt filled me in on some things. One of them was a secret I let slip.

I made a drunken confession to Matt while I was home, trying to get everything out. I don't even remember telling him. But he told me this morning what was said. It's something he didn't know. It's something I wasn't going to reveal but I was drunk and sometimes that truth serum really fucks with you. I was crying, hugging the toilet, trying to empty all the "cherry drops" and "rum and diets" from my system. I let it all out. Even though it upset me, I thought he had a right to know.

(Tam, crying) "I have to tell you something. But, I'm not supposed to tell you."
(Matt) "Okay?!?"
(Tam) "I shouldn't tell you this."
(Matt) "Tell me what?"
(Tam) "But you're going to find out anyway."
(Matt) "Okay, just tell me."
(Tam) "It's Claire."
(Matt) "Who's Claire?"
(Tam) "She's the cheerleader."
(Matt) "So? She's a cheerleader. I still don't know who she is. And what does she have to do with anything?"
(Tam) "She has powers. They all do. Heroes."
(Matt) "The friggin TV show? You're unbelievable!"

So, now he knows.

9 comments:

Rachel said...

Haha! Sounds like something my always-sober self would say. Classic, Tam. :)

Kristen said...

I want to marry you. ANd you looked beautiful!!!

Kristen said...

Also, I am glad someone else was throwing up on Saturday with me.

Tam said...

I can't believe some people thought that was made up? I actually DID have that conversation with Matt. Everytime I read it, I laugh.

Rachel, I am too old for this. My body knows this better than I do.

Carmen, obviously someone slipped something into my drink because I am never drunk at parties...or throwing up on my own car floor, as Kristen can attest.

Kristen, you have a few months left to woo me.

Gina Ventre said...

That red satiny top is h-h-hot.


I'm too old for partying too...sigh.

MrsTito said...

Nope, I win the old person award for the weekend. Both Friday and Saturday night, I was in bed before 10 p.m. And for no good reason, I didn't go out the night before, I didn't work overtime, I wasn't sick, I am just old.

Anonymous said...

You look smokin' in that top!

I was at the boss's holiday party on Saturday. Managed to keep to just a few glasses of wine. Got to the verge of being too tipsy (which makes me loud-er and obnoxious-er and a secret spiller) and switched to Sprite.

Satiny tops are the shizznet this season.

Jenson said...

That's funny

Tam said...

DUDES! That top was only 12 dollars at Value City!

A nanny since 1996, I'm tired of washing nipples that aren't mine.