*This test may offend. **Results may not be as accurate for male homosexuals...not because we at I Wish I Was Canadian believe that male homosexuals are gross in nature but because some issues may not apply to male homosexuals. Thank you.
HOW DISGUSTING ARE YOU?
.
Please choose the letter that best describes you.
.
.
A. I bathe every day, if not more.
B. I bathe every other day.
C. I bathe once a week, if I'm lucky.
D. I bathe when someone asks me if I know what that smell is in the office.
E. I don't even own soap.
.
A. I wash my hands all the time, for exactly six seconds a finger.
B. I wash my hands after I go to the bathroom or I've touched raw meat.
C. I wash my hands when they feel dirty.
D. Why wash my hands when I just showered last week?
E. Again, fuck soap.
.
A. I've never been near the inside of my nose.
B. I've picked my nose.
C. ...and I know what it tastes like.
D. I've picked someone else's nose (does not apply to your own children or Kristen's dogs).
E. I pick anything including scabs, belly buttons and my herpes sores.
.
A. I have a toothbrush for cleaning my toothbrush.
B. I have a toothbrush with a timer to tell me when my teeth are clean.
C. I have a toothbrush for morning breath.
D. I have a toothbrush because the dentist gave me one a few years ago.
E. I don't have teeth.
.
A. I keep my house immaculate.
B. I pick up my house if it's messy.
C. I clean when someone is coming over.
D. I like my hell hole.
E. I've lost things in my own living room/shopping cart.
.
A. No urine has ever touched my bathtub.
B. I never/rarely pee in the shower.
C. I've peed in the shower when I've really had to go.
D. I pee in the shower every time.
E. I've even shit in my shower.
.
A. I've only had sex in the dark, at a scheduled time.
B. I've had sex inside four walls only.
C. I will have sex when the moment strikes me, whatever time or wherever place that may be.
D. I had sex in front of a group.
E. I've had sex with an animal in front of a group.
.
A. I've never slept with someone on the first date.
B. I've surrendered after a great first or second date.
C. I've hooked up with someone before I knew their background.
D. Most times, I didn't even know their last name.
E. I've slept with three or more (mostly coherent) people in one afternoon.
.
A. I am anal.
B. I heard of anal sex.
C. I've had anal sex.
D. I prefer anal sex.
E. I am having anal sex...RIGHT (thrust) NOW!
.
A. I can't even say menstruate.
B. I've never had sex with someone while they were or I was menstruating.
C. I totally went with it, even though I was or she was on her period.
D. Sex and oral sex are hot while someone is on their period.
E. I only have sex when it's disgusting. I can't get off otherwise.
.
.
RESULTS
.
Mostly A's: You are more than likely on some sort of medicine for compulsive disorder. You probably only have pets that require very little maintenance...like a rock or a sim fish. You enjoy your freedom of a germ free home and have people sprayed down before entering it. You also like to wash down the walls in your free time. I would probably not be your friend and you're taking this test because you want to make sure you are the absolute cleanest person on the internet.
.
Mostly B's. You want to be a little gross, but are a bit afraid of what others might think of you. You usually prefer your own bathroom to public ones and if you ever DO have to go in Wal Mart, ...forget it. You'd never go in a Wal Mart restroom. You usually do the right thing. Your fingernails are a chalky white as you read this. I would probably be your friend, but I usually don't swear around you because I know how much it embarrasses you to hear "clit". You're here because you sometimes read my blog but prefer my MySpace.
.
Mostly C's: You like to get in trouble a little. Sometimes you walk out of a store without paying for something. Most times, you're talking about sex or thinking about it. You've definitely had angry sex. You like to go out and have a good time, not usually caring if anyone is watching. People find you easy to talk to and are usually comfortable in your home, except for the occasional dust. You are probably one of my best friends. Why haven't you called, bitch?
.
Mostly D's: Although you think you are semi-liked, sometimes it's hard to tell you that you really should wash more. Hell, sometimes it's hard to even stand too close to you. You probably have adult acne that won't clear up no matter the medication. Your socks don't match and have many holes. What the hell is growing on your coffee table? And your car hasn't been cleaned since the day it was driven off the lot. Most people think a maid service or body wash would be a perfect present for you this Christmas. You may be my friend or a relative I can't get rid of. Tic Tac?
.
Mostly E's: Jesus, you're disgusting! What is all over your keyboard? And I don't even want to know why your toilet is that color. You should be on medication, if not admitted. And you may even be homeless, using the computer at the library. I would let it slide that the hair on your head and the hair on your back have fused together as one hair shirt/hoodie, but that breath! It's almost as if you ate the cigarettes and onions as stew. You are more than likely NOT my friend and only reading this because you misspelled something while searching for something else Canadian. I'm assuming animal.
15 comments:
I'll have to take this test with Monica when I get home.
Are you going to the Erie Bloggers thing this Thursday at Panera?
Man you read me like a flipping book. Or I'm flattering myself. Mostly C's.
At first I was a little ashamed at my 7 C's, but after reviewing the description, I realize that it fits.
Remember as a teenager reading magazines, you always KNEW the right answer to pick so you didn't end up with the "freak" results? It felt kind of like this. I've never eaten my boogers, but I KNEW that would get me the middle of the road answer, so I chose it.
I bet you used to cheat on Choose Your Own Adventure too! Sinner
I'm mostly C's as well. Must be why we all get along so well.
yes, I am planning on going to the erie blogger thing.
No, I had way too much OCD for that! I always had to choose my adventures in exact order. The first time through, I chose all the A answers, then the second time, I would choose a B, etc, etc until I effectively read every variation of the entire story possible.
You should see me flip out if someone skips a crossword in the puzzle book. You must go in order. It's the rules.
I was split pretty evenly between Bs and Cs. I guess I'm not as disgusting as I want to be.
But at least I have some medical knowledge to help fight all the infections you sicko's will be getting.
Sorry Tam, I've been insulting everyone today, you're just next in line.
that's alright. It wasn't really an insult to me since I never posted my results.
I think Tam was B's with some A's sprinkled in. I had The most C's, but was in close running with A's because I am OCD about specific things. For the wash your hands one I almost picked "whenever they feel dirty" but realized that you probably were not considering once an hour to fall under that heading.
Actually I was thinking maybe two to three times a day (besides after going to the bathroom). I'm not as prudish as you may think.
You wanted to know and the results are in. I'm mostly B's and C's with a couple of A's thrown in. I'm gathering you may have known this all along. I need to refresh my pic. Halloween is over.
NaTamsha, I don't think its a question of prudishness, I just think your slightly cleaner than me.
I am a B-C person. What a good test.
Emily yelled at me this morning to wash my hands because "I touched my pee pee" - I forget she's watching sometimes and sometimes at home, I forget to wash my hands. I can confess that now because no one will read this far back...
Post a Comment