When I was pregnant with Britain, it really wasn't all that bad. It was a great pregnancy, actually. It's not the reason why I'm through with having children. SHE'S not even the reason why. I'm just through. I've raised the 5 girls I nanny over the last 10 years, so she feels like my 6th. And I'm content with one (6). I want to give her everything I can, and since I haven't won the lottery (yet), that's kind of limited. But I'm doing the very best I can, and so far she is a delightful, energetic, and brilliant baby. She has earned the nickname "The Politician" because she works the room everywhere she goes. I'm content that it couldn't be any better.
Then last night happened.
I had a lot of diet coke this weekend...Some with rum, some with ice, some with lime. I had really started to wean myself off and didn't really ever drink it except if I was out to a fast food place and that has also been rare lately. So I thought my horrible gas pains last night stemmed from too much carbonation. I was doubled over and felt like I was going to vomit. Finally I sat on the pot and tried to go.
And soon it was apparent that it was not gas pains at all but rather uterine/menstrual cramping. I know this may be hard to believe but I've never felt cramps until last night. During labor, I believe I only experienced back labor because I can't remember pain in my abdominal region. And they thought I was crazy during my stress tests while I was pregnant because apparently I was contracting but couldn't feel it. When I asked other mothers who had already went through labor what contractions felt like, they referenced "the worst cramps you've ever had". Um, thanks.
I try not to be a vulgar person. Really! (except with Kristen). I won't go into too much detail. But what came out of me was not from my colon and it was not brown. It was dark red with somewhat grey matter.
I called Matt down to make sure I wasn't crazy, and to get me a bucket since by that time I was REALLY nauseous. I'm pretty sure it was a miscarriage. I've never had one before, to the best of my knowledge but I've went through them with other people. It explained the fatigue I'd been feeling over the weekend that I'd just chalked up to traveling. I took a three hour nap which hasn't happened since the first few months of my pregnancy. And unfortunately, early miscarriages are common with the birth control I'm on.
I went to bed with 1000 mg of Tylenol and a little regret for something that might have been.
14 comments:
I'm sure I've told you my theory on getting pregnant while on birth control, but I will say that I've had severe clotting that looked like something it could not have been and you should consider going in for a check up just to make sure everything is alright. Because you've never been regular in that department, I'm more inclined to think this was actually a clean out than anything else.
I have had clotting before. This was different...very different. And I've been regular for three plus years now. You know me and doctors. I'll wait until my yearly in a few months because I'm fucking stubborn.
Yeah, I'm sure you're familiar with clotting, I'm talking really unnatural clotting but if you think its safe to wait...stubborn.
It's probably all the fat free mayo and Lean Pockets I ingest.
Much better. Still a little tired, but Brit was up at 5 so go figure.
Thanks!
I told you that fat free mayo was poison! It probably killed your baby!
Was that over the line? Is there a line?
I'm not offended by much because I'm not an asshole who takes everything literally. They ARE on here though.
Oh yes...they are.
Nah, the mayo didn't kill the baby. It's probably the heroin and fat line she did that took it out.
Protip: Put the needle in the vein in your big toe instead of your arm to hide the track marks!
I kid, I kid!
By the way, where my money at ho?
Ask Matt.
I'm busted ass broke.
so, let me get this straight.... you eat lean pockets with fat free mayo? what do you do, dip the lean pocket in the mayo? or do you spread it on top? you could spread the mayo on one lean pocket, and then put another lean pocket on top and have a lean pocket and mayo sandwich!
and on a more serious, yet still not-so-serious, note... ever have peanut butter and mayo sandwiches? i used to as a kid and they are awesome!
and on a even more serious, yet still serious, note... you should get that checked out. i'm not a doctor, and definitely not a woman, but pooping babies just doesn't sound right to me..... (perhaps my wording could of been a tad better? it's all in good fun...)
hope you feel better today!
I don't eat fat free mayo and Lean Pockets TOGETHER. I'm not really a mayo person as it is. But Kristen teases me because I eat all chemical containing food, which is true.
I also used to swallow my gum.
OMG. This line is the best!
"i'm not a doctor, and definitely not a woman, but pooping babies just doesn't sound right to me"
you know kristen, ever since i met you i figured you for a baby-pooping kind of gal. :)
and tam, i also used to swallow. my gum.
Youre dirty!
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