I have a secret blog, just for me. Because of Kristen's newest post, I've decided to reveal a little of it. Consider this my own Post Secret.
"I'm not trying to start a fight...because we've had quite a few of those lately...but to say that you hate sarcasm, I feel, was basically another way of saying you hate ME or rather hate who I am. I think there are a lot of things you say to intentionally hurt me. And you can go on and on, pretending that you are sincere and sensitive to everyone's needs, that you wouldn't say a bad thing about anybody but I've seen it. I've felt it."
"Why do you still blame me? Even more, why do you still have feelings for me?"
"I can't help but resent you sometimes. I could have done a lot more with my life. When asked if I'd do it all differently, I wouldn't. But sometimes I think I might be happier."
"I think you're blind. I think you might just fuck up again. I don't understand why you were there in the first place but it scares the shit out of me that you might go back again, and soon. And all I want is how it used to be, when I trusted everything about you. And I honestly fear you're not blind at all."
"You're the reason why I think about every morsel I put into my mouth. I've never had anyone make me feel as low as when you were around, judging me. And now YOU'RE heavier than I am. Why does this matter to you so much? Why does it matter to me? You were one of the worst influences in my life. Why do we still call each other 'friends'?"
"You know what, Bitch? You have nothing to worry about. I am in no way after what you have since, in my eyes, you have nothing."
"Why don't you return my text messages? Is your phone overdue again? You should make HIM pay the bill instead of paying everything for him. I can't stand the power he holds over you. What the fuck is so special about him? He's a ghetto kid with control issues. And why couldn't you pick out your OWN curtains? And why do you take his calls about curtains over mine about us?"
"No matter how many times I scream at you or tell you it isn't right, you continue to lie to my face...and about the stupidest shit!"
"It makes me so angry how fake you always are. Its like you have an injection of botox for any wrinkle in your life. I don't think I've told you one secret, one wish because its like talking to a wax figure. Do you really think we don't know, we can't SEE that you're just an orgasm waiting to happen."
"You take advantage of me, but I let you."
"You don't call me unless you want something from me. In fact the only conversations we've had, telephone or otherwise, have been about you."
"You've told me you worry about me but what I hear is that you don't trust me."
"I'm really sorry I was so horrible to her. I think about how many mistakes I've made with her, and even him, and I wonder why they still talk to me at all. Sometimes I think I'm going to make the same mistakes with you."
"If I never knew you, never met you, never looked your way I think you'd be better off."
8 comments:
These are like Post Secret. I'm imaging the postacrd art that goes with them :)
Good god almighty. It's impossible not to see yourself in these, especially if you're overly self involved like I am. What a lovely release. And the "orgasm waiting to happen" is such a gorgeous metaphor - I'm upset I didn't write it myself.
Thats so funny Kristen, since looking back at these, not one of them is about you. I'm sure some are pretty transparent as to whom they ARE about.
Well I do call and force you to listen to me whine for an hour a week...but I thought these were really well thought out, wordy explosions...I don't know, I just really liked them as subject matter.
I think the rule in stealing others'lines is 6 months w/o publishing and it becomes free game. This doesn't mean that people won't feel robbed of their words and thouhgts, but if in 6 months they don't publish it, or at lease use it in a piece, then no bitching allowed.
Or at least this was the practice of my creative writing prof at KSU
Oh, I thought they were all about the same person which made it a little confusing. Some do seem like they would be obvious to the person they are about. Unless of course any of them are about me because I did not recognize myself in any of them. (ctm)
I guess I didn't explain this very well since many others I've spoken to are not understanding this post as well. I took these from a secret blog I have where I can bitch and vent about whomever I want because nobody reads it (that I know of). Yes, they are all quotes from me. Yes, they are all about people or situations in my life. And no, these things, incidents and disappointments are not things that really bother me much after the fact.
Hey, make sure you sign up for the Erie Bloggers group! That way I can embarass myself and you can make fun of me at the same time! IN PUBLIC!
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/eriebloggers/
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